A Smile of Insecurity

Throughout my life, I have always had one major insecurity. My teeth. Obviously, in my early ages I didn’t see it as a problem but once I began to get into my teenager years it hit me. What’s the word again? Ah yes, puberty. I would see people with perfect, white, straight teeth and be envious. It wouldn’t have bother me so much only that it seemed like everybody had perfect teeth, literally everyone! Maybe it’s a thing that gets fixed from an early age nowadays, I didn’t get that luxury unfortunately. They can smile without any fear of judgement or personal insecurity. I won’t lie, I’m jealous. It’s not that I don’t smile either, I do. But it doesn’t hide the fact that, in my mind, I don’t feel good doing it. I’m always aware. Always conscious. I always asked myself the same questions. Why can’t I have good teeth? Why can’t I smile without feeling insecure? Why haven’t my teeth been fixed yet?  Usually I can deal with and overcome my insecurities. This though, this is not so easy.

I know to a lot of people it may not even seem like a bad thing, but everybody has an insecurity that really bugs them. No matter how big or small, it’s still important and people need to understand this. My insecurity may seem stupid and not important in reality, but it’s important to me and I want to take a step to change it. It will make me feel so much better and at the end of the day isn’t that what matters? Being happy and confident with yourself. I think so. I’ve known plenty of people with insecurities and it has led them down a path of depression and exiled them in doing even simple everyday things. Luckily, I haven’t gotten to that stage but I understand that it’s just as easy to fall into that stage if you let yourself. Different minds cope differently. Mine copes with the knowledge that it is something I can fix. That I have to look on the positive side. I’ve learnt to deal with my insecurity until a time comes when I can change it. Now is the time!

A smile is a very important feature. It shows emotions of happiness, and lights up a face. The photo below shows the smile I have become adjusted too. I don’t believe it’s bad as such, although it’s not a conventional smile in my mind. An essential smile shows teeth, something I don’t feel comfortable with. That grin can go down as quickly as it went up!. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not looking for your run of the mill celebrity smile. Just a smile that’s straight and pleasant to the eye. It will also light up my face and give me that boost of confidence I need.

 

The smile I have become adjusted too

Crooked, Crooked, Crooked……………

The main problem I have with my teeth is that they’re as crooked as a fish hook! As you can see from the photo, they’re far from ideal. Each tooth is going this way and that way, with the chance of a straight line being non-existent. On my two front teeth, their are two relatively big stains which standout. According to the dentist, they were caused by a build up of calcium as a baby. I always was fond of milk! If only my little baby mind knew, if only! I also have one canine tooth that sticks out, making me look like a vampire gone wrong. As for my bottom teeth, if anyone is looking for a wave to surf then contact me.  I take care of my teeth, brushing twice a day but I just don’t feel confident when I look in the mirror and see this staring back at me. For as long as I can remember, my dentist has told me I need braces. I didn’t need a dentist to tell me that, but nevertheless here I am still braceless. Each demand was presented with a circumstance. A circumstance which led to me not getting braces. This happened a lot throughout my life. To make matters worse, my sister got braces. She now has that smile I longed for throughout my teenage years. I guess it made sense though, the only girl in the family. A princess must get her every desire!

Where does this leave me now? Taking matters into my own hands. I’m currently saving up for braces. The temporary job is going well and I should have something more permanent come college time. So it’s save, save, save until I have enough to get fitted.  It shouldn’t take me too long more. I think before the end of this year I should be a self proclaimed “braceface”. I’ve waited long enough!

If you take anything away from this post, it’s that you have to find a way to feel comfortable with your insecurities. Find adjustments until the time comes that you can make a change. Most importantly, don’t be afraid to make the change. It’s going to make you happier in the long run. It wasn’t easy for me to even post pictures of my teeth, but I’ve allowed myself to understand the problem. I’m also not afraid to fix the problem. I know it will take time and a lot of money but I’m willing to work to get here.

Let me know your insecurities in the comments below and how you deal with them?